Tormented Pieces
by Judgement Of Tears
Summary: [Forgottened] There had been too many times he’s been hurt, broken, damaged. Too many times he’s been trapped, lost and forgotten. A person can only take so much of reality before they break down completely. There’s nothing he could do now. Takao has won.
1. Forgottened

**Title**: Tormented Pieces

**Subtitle:** Forgottened

**Disclaim**: Have never own such wonderful characters...and never will...that is unless I get super rich. XP

**Warning: **If you decide to skip this part, it's not my problem that you find yourself hating the fanfic. This is probably going to be angst through the whole thing and shounen-ai all the way. Don't like, don't read, it's that simple.

**Inspired by:** Episode 125: Rei and Kai; the ultimate face-off.

**A/N:** This is a one-shot and will remain that way till otherwise. Please keep in mind that Rei doesn't know what Kai was thinking after the bluenette walked out of the stadium and leaned against the wall. So Rei doesn't know that Kai thinks he's a very skilled opponent okay? And also, this is taken place when they all gathered back together after the tournament or something. :D Just so you don't get confused. :)

* * *

I knew I was going to lose, going to fail my team and everyone else. Disappoint the fans, White Tiger X, and Kai. I know how much a good opponent is worth, and I really, really wanted to be worth of his time. But...there's always a limit. And this is mine. 

I'm never going to be as good as Takao.

Never going to appear strong in Kai's eyes.

Never going to be noticed... 

I tried my best. I really did. I poured my heart, my soul into that battle. And I still lost. I guess my best just isn't good enough, Kai's advancing to the next round and I'll be the loser. He's going to experience first-hand just how strong Takao really is, and then he'll regret ever-even thinking of betraying the BBA revolutions.

Power is everything... 

And that perspective isn't going change. First I thought maybe that was wrong, but as I remembered how Kai had battled, I starting to doubt myself.

Battle with the mind, not heart.

Was that how a battle should be fought? But then again, Kai has always been an amazing blader and that was what he said while still being part of the Bladebreakers. Yet, Takao won all his battles with his heart...right?

What am I doing? I'm never going to win this, win against Takao. He's always the one winning. Even when everything's against him, he still would win. And this battle is just another piece-of-cake for him, nothing big.

It's never going to be me...

I know. I know I should just give up now. But by nature, I'm a stubborn person and giving up just isn't one of the choices I have in mind, even though it's against the world champ.

There's nothing I can do...

I don't want to lose. But I don't want to get hurt again like the battles against Bryan and...Kai. Why was he so blind to hurt me so much anyways? Was he that eager to get to Takao? I guess that's just another sign to show I've lost. He didn't notice me...didn't notice how much damage he's done to me. Didn't even show a tiny bit of care when I was down...

He never even glanced.

It's like I'm just another unknown blader to him. To Kai, I'm not even worth the effort of a glance. He'd retrieve so fast out the exit, so happy he can face off against Takao, that I was completely forgotten, vanished from his mind. Or maybe I was never there...

Nobody noticed...

No body ever will...my old teammates, my friends. All their eyes were on Kai, the winner. I bet Takao is just as happy as Kai is right now. I'm just another obstacle needing to be broken down. And why? Why out of the billions of people it has to be Kai? Why can't I just stick with Mao or Salima or any one but Kai! Why can't something just go right for once!

* * *

Far away, he could hear cheers and laughter and voices. There were people filled up amongst the grass area, some lying down, and some sitting up. They were all waiting for the meteor rain to come. This was a rare occasion, it only happens once every 30 years. Yet, one lonesome boy wasn't excited at all to see shooting stars. He sat on the roof of a blue dojo, with head down, and eyes like a blank board. 

He could hear his friends' laughter ringing from inside the house as they prepared to lie on the grass and watch the star show, never once noticing that someone was missing. His hair was slowly slipping out of the loosened white bind, and the white bandages around his lower arm were slowly stained with crimson. His whole being ached with pain yet his face never once twitched or even moved. The dim golden eyes continued to focus on something on the ground, never once blinked, showing nothing but emptiness.

This was Rei Kon. The one who's been through so much, and hasn't given up on life till now. His once flawless skin was now filled with scars from harsh battles and his once bright eyes have dimmed into a lifeless gold.

"Hey where did Rei go?" his friends were completely oblivious to his conditions, as Takao's voice questioned.

"I don't know. I saw him walk out of the door. Haven't seen him since 7." Max's ever-so-cheerful tone answered.

"It's almost 9 guys! He's been out way too long!" The chief answered as he stopped his fingers from dancing over the keyboard of his laptop.

"I'm sure he'll be back. He's not like Mr. Sourpuss here, who just disappears forever." A glare could almost been seen sending Takao's way as he reassured.

"Come on then! Let's go or we'll miss the show!" the three made their way into Rei's blank view as they exited the dojo, not once noticing the figure atop of the Japanese house.

Silently, tears descended down his cheeks, turning into cold droplets as they soaked his clothes and bandages. The winter atmosphere was cold to the bone, yet there he sat, with nothing but his usual Chinese outfit, arms wrapped around his knees and chin just resting atop of them.

His mind a spacious room, with no thoughts, no concerns, no nothing. Just a plain field with darkened skies and bare tree branches, grass stained a dying yellow. His once brilliant world had gone, leaving behind this bare wasteland. Some thought maybe he could of survived through such a silent heartbreak, but that was just the trigger to his mind.

There had been too many times he's been hurt, broken, damaged. Too many times he's been trapped, lost and forgotten. A person can only take so much of reality before they break down completely. And that was his last straw.

To think he had his future all planned out. Was going to fall in love, get married, and have a family. But destiny is so cruel, so malicious, and so heartless. She was responsible for ruining his prefect plans, for letting him fall in love with Kai.

There's nothing he could do now. Takao has won. Nothing more...

_**Owari...?**_

**A/N:** I know, I know, that was soooo short! But I never actually planned to stop there...like he said, destiny is cruel. XD I will probably have another chapter or so on Kai's POV but haven't decided yet.


	2. Remants of My Sacrifice

**Title**: Tormented Pieces

**Subtitle:** Remnants of My Sacrifices

**Disclaim**: You wish…T. T

**Warning: **If you decide to skip this part, it's not my problem that you find yourself hating the fanfic. This is probably going to be angst through the whole thing and shounen-ai all the way. Don't like, don't read, it's that simple.

**Inspired by:** Episode 125: Rei and Kai; the ultimate face-off and by a picture I saw on a live journal's layout.

**A/n:** Somehow I knew this story will have a second and final chapter...for some odd reason. Guess female sixth sense is strong. ;) Okay, because of the requests and because some of my personal inspiration, I have decided to add a final chapter to this one-shot, which will make it a two-shot ;) And also, some confusion with the one-sided thingy, I didn't know what that meant and I thought it sounded cool so I added on, but it's not a one-sided k? You'll see in this chapter…

* * *

Down the darkened hallway of the beystadium, along the cold walls of the deep blue, there were the faint shadows of two distinct figures, one slender and slim while the other muscular and fit. 

One had unordinary long ebony hair, the long bangs of the black straws hovered over his two golden orbs. The other had slate hair of two shades, one silver and one sapphire, his eyes were also unseen by no one else but the Asian in front of him.

Slowly, and slowly, the gap between them closed up, leaving only a line of midnight blue light, outlining the realm of their necks. The colours of black and blue mixed and intertwined together. Their bodies fit into one another's perfectly as the older of the two wrapped his arms around the smaller teen, tangling his fingers into the softness of the other's long hair, desperately gaining back what was lost. He missed the other's scent so much, and such close distance still wasn't satisfying such hunger and lust. The blessings of that moment would of continued to rain down on to the two if it weren't for that string of tears running down the black-haired boy's cheeks.

The crystal tears were illuminated by the dim light of the hall, and the moment one of them dropped and left the trail, the kiss was broken.

Kai felt that drop of coldness onto his arm. And then a few more came down with it. He was surprised to say the lest, having Rei shed tears at such a moment.

"Rei…"

He released the other from his embrace. And for the first time, those amber eyes didn't look up at him with their brilliance of the sun and their shine of emotions. They were looking everywhere but at him. And then they closed, resulting in more droplets of sorrow and pain and…fear.

"Kai…I…can't…"

Rei knelt down and had his face buried into his palms, refusing to meet the other's eyes.

Kai knew, he knew in his mind what was wrong. He could see the bandages exposed. They were stained with an unusual red. They were dark, like his eyes, or maybe even darker then them.

He reached out, he wanted to comfort the boy in front of him. But at the instant he made contact with Rei's bare skin, the Asian flinched and moved back, landing on his bum with his back pressed again the cold and hard wall behind him.

"Please don't…I'm…I'm afraid of you…Kai…"

The blunette stopped; he stopped reaching out to the raven-haired beauty. He stopped breathing. He stopped his heartbeats, not for sheer joy and happiness, but for pure shock and pain. He froze.

"Please…"

Those tears continue to run down his flushed cheeks, he was crying out, begging for the other to leave, to leave him. To go to whom he thought Kai desired for.

Those annoying black dots appeared again. They were slowly covering his already blurred vision. Slowly erasing his captain's image from his mind…

* * *

I knew that someday, god would give his punishments on all of my sins, my wrong doings. I knew it. But I never knew, that the burden of this punishment was so hard to carry. It was heavy, as if the world was on my shoulders. But I know why… 

Not only was I the one that marked your once flawless skin with those ugly wounds, but I was going to be the cause of your in coming…

No, No! You won't die. You're strong. I know you can pull through this. .

I've never been so desperate before. My mind wanted so badly to escape from all this. I knew now, what hell felt like. I knew now what my real limits were. I was faced with reality, and it was even harder then all of those inhuman trainings and beatings at the Abbey.

But even though I can't bear to look at your unconscious state, I can't look away, because your face looked so peaceful, so blessed.

You were lying upon the bed, still hasn't awoken yet after so many days. You laid motionless, with a needle inserted into your left wrist, blood dripping into your pale skin, trying to revive you from the lines you were currently standing on between death and life. White, fresh bandages covered up all your wounds.

The machine was an annoyance; it's beeping seemed to never go away. But I don't want it to stop, because it's the indication of your heartbeats. And if it ever stopped, your life will…

I haven't the strength to say it. I can't. I won't believe you will let go of your life, even after what you've said.

"_Kai…?"_

_That voice. _

"_Why are you…still here…?"_

_The words were spoken in an out-of-breath tone._

_He turned from his position on the bed, and looked to person at the door. _

"_Rei…"_

_He was about to smile, about to reach out once again and feel the familiar skin upon his finger tips, but…_

"_No…you're not supposed to be here…you're supposed to be with…Takao…and he already left…"_

_That sentenced confused him, more so, it shattered his heart._

_Rei spoke as though the one that the blunette loved was Takao. He spoke as though he didn't want him to be here at all._

"_Kai…you're not supposed to be here. Why are you forcing yourself to be here? I don't need you to force yourself just to stay for me…I'll be fine…" _

"_Rei, I'm not forcing myself." He searched in those two sun-kissed orbs for an answer, for anything that could explain Rei's words._

"_Kai! Please don't do this now…I don't want this now…all I want is for you to go with the one you really love. All I want is for you to be happy…" Rei's eyes showed his exhaustion, and even though his spoke in such a soft tone, it was still loud compare to the silence._

**_All I want is for you to go with the one you really love…_**

_What does that mean? He loved Rei, he still do. _

"_I did…"_

"_No! You didn't! You love Takao! Just admit it! I don't want these lies no more…I want to rest, I want out…" _

**_You love Takao…_**

"_I…I love…Takao! Rei, what's the matter with you? How can I ever love…him?"_

"_How can you not? All your life, you've strived to be the best. And in order to do that you searched for the strongest power... I don't have that Kai. I don't have the things you're looking for…Takao does. He has strength, skills and everything else you've wanted. You battled him remember? You…you've seen and experienced first-handed just how strong he really is. I don't stand a chance against him…I'm weak…" drops of pain and hurt rolled down the side of his face, retracing their old root. They made his eyes more prominent then ever. _

_And as Rei stopped to take in a shuttering breath to obtain his emotions, Kai finally understood his thoughts. Rei doubted him. He has given up against the fight he knew he was going to lose against Takao. _

_Kai chuckled dryly. _

_The Asian looked up again, and flinched slightly at the cold, harsh crimson eyes._

"_I understand now…that's why you stopped taking you medicine. Stopped treating your wounds. That's why you didn't care weather you lived or died. It's not like you Kon" the other's emotionless voice, and the use of his last name was like knifes driving into his already bleeding heart, "…I've never seen you give up before…why now…"_

"_I can't win. Ever since the beginning, I couldn't win. I knew that. I don't want to fight no more. I just want to rest for a while. I've been fighting all my life. And I've won a few times, and I'm losing now. I don't have the strength to go on…I love you Kai…I do. And I will always, but I just…want to rest now…"_

_/Then why can't I hold you when you rest? Why can't I be there when you sleep/_

**_I'm afraid of you…_**

"_Then why are you afraid of me Rei?"_

"_I don't ever want to be your opponent when you were like that…I was afraid that you would lose control again and…hurt me on purpose…" there was a lump in his throat from the dryness of the day, yet he continued, hoping this will unravel Kai's confusion. "I'm so afraid that you would leave me, abandon me…I'm not strong enough for that yet. Like I said, I'm weak. So after so much preparation, I can accept it, because nothing last forever…" _

"_Is that it? That's the reason you almost killed yourself? God Kon, you're an idiot, you know that?" Kai chuckled at that; he chuckled at the stupidity of this whole misunderstanding._

"_You want to know the reason why I so desperately wanted to face Takao? It's because Takao is the best, and by defeating him, I can show the world…show you…"at the moment, his eyes softened with its rare gentle flames dancing in them, "…that I do deserve someone like you…" _

_Time ticked by, yet that sentence echoed in Rei's mind for a long time. Forever it seemed. _

**_That I do deserve someone like you…_**

_/He…/_

_It was his turn to freeze, letting time pass him by. He stared at those eyes. They shone the fierce flames of truth. The wine-stained orbs showed no lies, not even the darkest corners. _

"_Y-you…. you mean all this time…I've been…lying to myself?" He couldn't believe this, it was miracle that Takao didn't win after all, yet the truth was so hard to handle. _

_All this time, his mind was playing tricks on him. It wanted him to rest, so that it can rest too. He'd forgotten to listen to his heart. Even when it's shattered, bleeding, broken, it was still beating. It still gave directions to him, yet he has forgotten what he believed in. _

"_No one can really blame you for that…after all…."The blunette turned away from Rei's gaze as he spoke on, "I did almost killed you once…"_

_The only Rei could do was to continue staring at Kai's form. He almost died for his stupidity and for this big misunderstanding. He almost died because his mind wouldn't stop thinking up ridiculous thoughts._

"_Rei…if you want…I can do anything, just to show that I'll never…ever…leave your side…" Suddenly, the distance between them seemed so much closer. _

_Rei felt his fears dissolve into small pieces of puzzles. His lips curved upward for the first time in a long time. His eyes illuminated in their fullest colour. His face lilted up as if world peace was just around the corner. _

"_Arigatou (Thank you)…"

* * *

_

Your conditions have gotten worse over the pass week. You didn't take the medicines that you were instructed to take. You didn't change your bandages once every 3 to 4 hours. You didn't care weather you lived or died. And as result of your carelessness, you were here, heart barely beating.

I can't be mad at you though, not before and not now. The fault was my own. I never once took notice of your conditions. It was supposed to be my job, my responsibility, yet I failed. And this was the consequences, god's punishment.

But at least now, your breath was no longer shallow and rapid. Your wounds no longer bleeding.

You've calm down now, looking more like a dead person then ever. Your tanned skin was pale like a ghost. Your lips were tinted with the colour of purple and blue.

"Wake up Rei…."

I wish you would. I wish I could once again, see those gold depths looking at me in curiosity. Even if you would look at me filled with animosity, filled with anger, I would still be thankful that they are open, and you were alive and well. Not looking so…lifeless.

I'm sorry Rei…

I'm so sorry…

I shouldn't of lost control like that…

I shouldn't of let the public image take over me…

I shouldn't have…done this to you…

I should have never appeared in your life…

Then maybe you would of lived longer…happier…

I couldn't control it now more, my emotions. I no longer have my grip on them. Something wet dripped down my cheeks. It blurred my vision of you. In the corner of my eyes I watched those playful little drops dampen the spot on the white bed sheet.

The sun seems to disappear behind the tall buildings of downtown. And once again, darkness consumed the world, and I hope that in the dark, I can find you, walking beside me again, holding my hand again, and reassuring that everything was going to be fine.

"I'm sorry…"

I can't say anything else; apologize was the only thing I could do. And through the rest of the days, I will guard you, be by your side like I promised. And I also swear, nothing will ever cause you pain and hurt you, not them, not your friends, and not me.

I can't save you…I've come to realize that I have power. I have strength. I am a skilled blader. I can defeat anyone if I put my will to it. But it's all useless now. Because my powers and my skills…

Can't save you.

* * *

**_Time passes by…_**

* * *

It was now a new beginning of the seasons. Spring has fallen over the city, reviving all lives lost over autumn and winter of last year. The cycle of life and of time will continue on and on, where new generations will be born and revolutions will be made. Somewhere in the universe, there will records of things done in time, of every person's happiness, their pain, their sorrow, and their memories. 

This boy was no exception. His hands were on the bars constructed onto the silver wheelchair. He was pushing it to where the view of the sea and of the faraway mountains could been seen. The softness of the spring breeze had messed up his hair even more then before. His ruthless two-shaded blue hair covered his eyes as he continued to push on.

On the device was another young boy. He was staring straight ahead. He had flawless skin upon his face, his hands rested on his lap. His long ebony hair was tied loosely with a delicate silver clip. He had eyes of the sun; it would of cast even the richest gold to shame.

Yet in these eyes, there was nothing. Not a trace of life, not a shine of light.

He was Rei Kon, once an active member of the Bladebreakers. Now, he no longer battled in the dish, where the actions were. He only listens.

The sun had now slowly disappeared over the shoulders of the giant mountains, yet its last rays reached over the hills and the houses, and sprinkled down to every person that it can reach, creating shadows amongst the earth.

He sat there, unmoving.

A shine of the last sunset entered his eyes, and for a moment, it was as if, his amber, sun-kissed orbs have once again revived from its sleep.

Kai knelt down beside the boy, his eyes shown in the sunset. Those crimson pools showed his shattered dreams, his regrets and yet, buried beneath those tormented emotions was a glint of hope. Gently and carefully, he pulled back the hair that had gotten to his face.

Kai Hiwatari, a formal skilled leader of the Bladebreakers. People call him the guardian now, because he has never once left Rei's side, he was Rei's guardian angel. People thought it was waste, to throw such a successful future of his away just like that. They don't understand anything at all. They don't understand his silent promises made.

Every single night, when it's time to put himself to rest, he would do a silent pray. With his heart filled with impossible dreams and his ruby eyes shining with renewed hope, he would pray, that one day, a miracle would happen and Rei would once again, move, talk, walk, run like he used to. He believed, that someday it would happen. Rei will revive from his state of living without life and death without dying…he knew it was impossible, he knew even a miracle can't achieve that. But he also know, that with the power of believe, dreams come true. He believed it. Rei was strong; god would never turn away from his beautiful soul. Kai knew that. And that will be what keeps that dim fire inside him burning, keep him warm in the winter, keep him safe in the dark.

Those wounds upon Rei's arms have long disappeared, yet there was one scar left behind. Itwas a remnant ofapart of their memories; apart of their past, and it concealed one of the deepest concepts of love.

It was significant…in its own unique way.

* * *

_**Owari…**_

* * *

**A/N:** Okay, let me make one thing straight. First of all, you know in First Aid in High school, they teach you circulation right? So, after 4 minutes, if your brain do not receive blood, there will be brain damage right? Okay, so now, Rei experienced that when he fainted while backing away from Kai. And the ambulance didn't come on time, so he has had major brain damage. And as a result, he has become what you called a "vegetable", haha very funny…. a "vegetable" is someone that can no longer move at all because their brain is dead and only their heart beats. So technically, he's alive but he can't live. Yeah, that didn't much sense but w/e. 

Feel free to ask any questions and things like that. I know this is very confusing, XD I tried to make as less complicated as possible but I need that touch of mystery and confusion. And there is just one question in my mind right now, it has nothing to do with this ff at all but I just finished watching CSI and does anyone know what "Revenge is best served cold." Mean? I kinda know the meaning, but I kinda don't…so…if anyone knows, could that person please be so kind and patient to explain it to me? Yeah, I'm an idiot…I know XP


End file.
